Happy/Sad

I am so so happy that Shannon and Michele are coming to visit tomorrow!  We are going to have a wonderful time in Ocean City!  I wish they were flying though…It is such a long drive.  I will be driving to Ocean City so they can take a rest on the way to the beach!  I can not wait to show two of my favorite girls my favorite beach!  I am also very glad they are coming tomorrow…….

Tomorrow is the 5th anniversary of the day my Mom died.  It is the saddest day of my life, followed only by the day I found out the my ex betrayed me and all things morally right!  My Mom died on a Friday so it’s kinda weird that tomorrow is a Friday!  I remember the day my Mom died like it was yesterday!  The night before my sister and I crawled into bed and held her and slept…all three of us together in a full size bed!  It was a squeeze, but it was one of the best nights.  Laura and I snuggled up to her and we felt so safe.  We knew she was dying….hospice had been telling us that it would be any hour now for about a week.  

I remember that I was in the guest room laying down and it was around 10am.  My Dad was sitting in the chair next to my Mom and my sister was laying in bed with my mom.  I got a phone call from my Mom’s friend Miss Kim.  She gave me the next that Miss Dinky (another friend of my Mom’s) had just passed away that morning.  Now we had been telling my Mom that is was okto move on for days now.  Hospice told us it would help her cross over.  She was in so much pain and she was pretty much unconscious for a whole week.  Well after hanging up the phone it was about 10:15am and I walking into my Mom’s bedroom and I said, “Hey Momma…that was Miss Kimmy, she was calling to tell me that Miss Dinky died this morning.  Mom if that is what you were waiting for, if you were waiting for Miss Dink so you didn’t have to do this alone, you can go now…..We understand.”  Then I sat next to her and held her hand and my Dad rubbed her leg and Laura held her other hand and we talked about how sad we were for Miss Dinky’skids(they are two girls the same age as Laura and I).  Then my Mom made a raspy sound and she inhaled and didn’t exhale.  Laura looked at my Dad with big crocodile tears in her eyes, she said “Dad is this it?”  he said “I think so.”  Then to prove my Dad wrong my Mom breathed out and then in one more time.  Then she was gone.  She was still there and we hugged her and kissed her and told her how much we loved her.  Then I called Hospice and the funeral home.  Then I called Jodi and Nikki and a few other close friends.  Jodi and Nikki and Mr. John (my Mom’s boyfriend) came over before the funeral home.  It was so sad.  I left before the funeral home got there.  I couldn’t be there to see them carry my Mom out our our house.  I went home and started cooking lasagna, we would need to eat after making the arrangements.  LOL  Then a while later my Dad picked me up and we went to the funeral homeand picked everything out.  It was hard, but I had to be strong.  After we were done with all of the choices Laura and I went to the Mall.  We needed clothes for the funeral.  I also called the church to set up the funeral.  We met with the priest that day too.  It all happened so fast!  

I miss my mom so very much!  She was the greatest, mom and friend anyone could ask for.

One year ago on May 23rd Laura found out that she was Pregnant with Miss Alyssa!  It was a gift from my Mom, I know it was! 

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6 Responses to “Happy/Sad”

  1. Debra Sue Says:

    Your mom sounds like a sweet, sweet lady. Even though it was tough, it is great that you were able to be there with her until the end.

    I am so glad the Gals will be there with you tomorrow and you’re focusing on fun stuff. Have a wonderful time!

  2. Lisanne Says:

    I didn’t realize that on May 23rd, Laura found out that Alyssa was on the way. That was DEFINITELY a gift from your mom. I completely agree. What a special thing.

    Thinking of you today, Lisa. I am SO sorry.

  3. Jenna Says:

    aw that so sad to hear! but i’m glad the girls are coming with you to have a GREAT weekend!!

    🙂

  4. whimsicalchaos Says:

    ugh now i’m crying like a baby…

  5. Allison Says:

    Thinking of you Lisa!

  6. Ani Says:

    Oh Lisa. Your post has made me weepy. How I am glad for you that you have good friends to be with you this weekend though. Good bye anniversaries as you so profoundly know can be so difficult.


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